Saturday was one of those beautiful crisp sunny days in Glasgow and we took the dogs for a long walk in our local county Park. Along the way I noticed the first signs of spring coming with all the beautiful colours of the spring flowers emerging.
It made me think that recovery from trauma and spring have a lot of similarities. When I look back at my own journey of healing from trauma (I was gang raped at thirteen) I can see that I did anything to numb out and not feel. I shut myself down and placed myself in the deep freeze for many years, not wanting to remember details from that night and cut off the many feelings I didn’t want to feel.
Many years later I decided I had no choice but to go back and face what had happened to me in order to find a way to accept it all and learn to be ok with it all. And I often refer to that moment in my life as pressing the defrost button, which not only brought me back to life but helped me to start living again!
My winter lasted for years and it seemed in a way like a death where I was lost, didn’t know what was going on and everything felt unknown.
Stepping into my spring took courage but it brought change and growth. And I see that spring is a reminder that all is not lost. When you feel like things are never going to change and you will always feel like this, remember that sooner or later the seasons will change bringing new beginnings.
Spring is transformation. From the grey to bursts of colour, cold to warmth and darkness to light. No matter how chaotic and long the winter is, spring is sure to follow.
So my message to you is never give up. It is possible to heal from trauma and lead a great life; recognising it’s a process and not a quick fix.
“The heart is like a garden. It can grow compassion or fear, resentment or love. What seeds have you planted there?” Jack Kornfield
Heal the past, live the present and dream the future!